What exactly is a promise ring?

When an agreement or oath has been made between two people, a promise ring is a piece of jewelry given as a token of the commitment that was made.

The promise made between two people can be practically anything. It’s imperative that both parties are clear on the meaning of the pact or pledge. For example:

• Monogamy: A promise to stay faithful to one another.

• Chastity or Purity: A promise to keep ones virginity until marriage.

• Friendship: A promise to seal a pledge of eternal friendship.

• Substance or Sobriety: A promise to remain free from addictive behavior (alcohol, drugs, food, gambling, etc.).

• Religious or Christian: A promise to remain committed to one’s faith or belief in the God of their understanding.

These are just a few of the more popular reasons to give or wear a promise ring.

Pre-Engagement

That being said, the most popular reason to give a promise ring is for pre-engagement. It has always been popular to exchange promise rings, so a couple can showcase their commitment to one another prior to getting engaged. In other words, this ring is symbolic of a promise there will be an engagement ring forthcoming.

This trial period before the engagement is a good way for a couple to test the waters before they make an actual commitment to marriage. Some may scoff at this gesture of pre-engagement. However, with the rise in divorce rates in this country it may be wise to start off slowly in the relationship instead of rushing ahead into something you are not ready for.

In fact, many beautiful promise rings can be purchased for around $100 – which is an excellent value for this symbolic piece of jewelry.

How does one wear a promise ring - which finger, which hand?

Basically it’s strictly a matter of personal preference, however the finger and hand you choose can depend entirely on the type of ring it is and in some cases the type of pledge. Most people associate the wearing of a ring on the left hand ring finger to mean that a significant commitment of some sort has been made.

If the promise is for pre-engagement, many couples choose to wear this ring on their left hand ring finger. They then switch the ring to their right hand once the actual engagement ring or wedding band is received. Likewise a ring exchanged for the promise of monogamy or fidelity would be worn on the left hand ring finger to symbolize that the wearer’s heart is taken.

Where did the promise ring originate?

Rings themselves have been symbolic for many thousands of years. The circle has no beginning and no end and is a strong symbol for eternity.

Have you ever heard of a scribbling ring? In sixteenth century England, uncut diamond crystals were set into rings and exchanged by lovers. The wearers of these scribbling rings would use the points of the diamonds to etch (or “scribble”) romantic writings to each other in glass, mirrors or windows.

Another popular ring exchanged during Shakespearian times was called a Posey Ring. Posey rings (or promise ring poems) are inscribed with poetic phrases or dates significant to the wearer.

It is believed that wearing words next to ones skin has a magical effect. These symbolic words may be carved on the outside or inside of the ring, or on both sides, there is no right or wrong way to do it!

Posey rings are a romantic way to share an expression of love and come engraved with beautiful sayings. It is no surprise that since French is said to be the language of love -- the French poseys are very popular. Some special phrases include:

• EN BIEN EMER - Encircled with love
• J'AIME ET J'ESPERE - I love and I hope
• MON COER AVEZ - My heart you have
• NE WEIL AYMER AUTRE QUE VOUS -- Do not wish to love any other
• PAR GRANT AMOUR -- For my greatest love
• PENCEZ DE MOY -- Think of me
• POUR TOUS JOURS -- For all days
• POUR AMOUR SAY DOUC -- For love so sweet
• POUR LE MEUX -- For the best
• TOUT POUR BIEN -- For all that is good
• UNE DEZIRE -- My one desire
• VOUS ET NON L' AUTRE -- You and no other
• A VILA MON COER, GARDI LI MO – Here is my heart, guard it well
• AMOR MEUS - My Love
• AUTRE NE VEUIL - No one -- but you
• DE M'AMOUR SOIEZ SURE -- Of my love be sure
• A Ma Vie De Coer Entier – My whole heart for my whole life

Other phrases:

In English :

ALL I REFUSE AND THEE I CHUSE

FAITHLES TO NONE YET FAITHFUL TO ONE

FORGET ME NOT

IN THY BREAST MY HEART DOTH REST

LOVE IS ENOUGH

MANY ARE THE STARRS I SEE, YET IN MY EYE, NO STARR LIKE THEE

I AM MY BELOVED'S AND MY BELOVED IS MINE

In Latin :

SEMPER AMEMUS -- Our love is forever

AMOR VINCIT OMNIA -- Love conquers all

CARPE DIEM -- Seize the Day

LIBERI VIVAS -- May you live carefree

In Spanish :

NO TENGO MAS QUE DARTE -- I have nothing more to give you but my heart

Christian :

GOD FOR ME PROVIDED THEE

GOD UNITE BOTH IN LOVE

WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED

Use your imagination and write a Posey of your own!

The list of Posey ring sayings is endless! If you really want to “wow” the love of your life, come up with a special phrase that is meaningful to just the two of you. Having a special ring engraved with one of your own poseys would be a very romantic way for you to share your most heartfelt sentiments with a special someone you care about!